Relationship 101...The End

Going through a separation is difficult for all parties involved...right? Unless you're secretly dancing on the inside because you're happy to be DONE with your spouse. ;-)

I try not to be cynical when it comes to matters of the heart a.k.a. love but sometimes I don't know. Coming out of a marriage where there was never any love doesn't have to result in your heart being blackened or thinking that "it" (love) will NEVER happen.


Shhh...but I AM dancing ;-)

Meanderings

Rain beating against the window pane
A puppy's sloppy kisses
Hugs from my children
The haughty laughter of friends
God's love

Relationships.....The Fixer Mentality

I grew up in a household in which my parents were married and I had two younger siblings. I knew that my parents loved each other and that they loved us......
So how the HellO I got myself in the "love" situations that I did????????? 


I've asked myself that question countless times......

There had to be something wrong with me right, right??

Well into my 30's and married, I had an epiphany.... I was the fixer. 

A fixer, according to Merriam- Webster, is a person who adjusts matters or disputes by negotiation. I thought that I could fix whatever issue these men faced, or fix something about their character/personality. I was so accommodating, willing to do whatever to make sure that they knew that I was "THERE" for them. All the time I was "fixing" I was getting, for a lack of better words, screwed over. Who could help the fixer? 

Anyway, once I owned up to being the fixer type, I knew that I had to take drastic measures to severe that characteristic from who I really was. I had to IMMEDIATELY STOP trying to fix! I had to know and realize my value and what I could offer my relationship and I had to be prepared for any and all consequences. 


1. You CAN NOT fix a man (woman). That individual will change when they're ready to.
2. You CAN NOT fix every situation that someone faces. That's actually hindering them from taking the responsibility to correct their own problems.
3. You do NOT have to be a fixer!!!