So it's been a few months since I've "said" anything. So here I am....HEY!!!
My August, September, October, November have been filled with rocky roads, tear stained pillows, ups downs, highs/lows but there has been a silver lining (why wouldn't there be) my children.
There are always things that we focus on when the times get tough and for me it's doing the utmost for my children. All parents say as they look into their newborn's eyes for the very first time, that they promise to make their lives better than their own. We promise to make their lives better, they'll get the best toys, go to the best school, wear the best clothes, never worry about being hungry or cold, always have a roof over their heads etc etc. But what we fail to realize that even if we give them EVERYTHING but have no happiness to share with them, it's all null and void.
My rambunctious crew, I've affectionately dubbed the 5 C's, know that I would do ANYTHING absolutely ANYTHING for them and give them what they wanted, if at all possible. But for the last couple months, I've been an unhappy mommy, having the occasional emotional breakdowns with unexplainable and inconsolable tears. They tried their best to wipe away my tears, hug me, make me pictures, cards, even little video messages those only aided in momentary feelings of happiness. It was not until I realized that I controlled my own happiness, no one or no situation should be able to make me feel less than. Like an epiphany, it came to me, all these years of trying to make some else happy, I had neglected my own.
And with that, I decided to take the steps to find my golden ticket a.k.a my happiness, in doing so giving my children ALL of me and EVERYTHING.
Along the ride, I've rediscovered things about myself, that I'm absolutely in love with! And I've even made some unbelievable strides and have been blessed tremendously like I've never imagined!!! I can't wait to share with you but for now, I've gotta keep it on the hush! :-) Just remember that God is forever faithful and when we cry out to Him, He's there listening, loving, and wanting the very best for His children.
My happy days are here...again
